Terry Kho : 2015

The Color of Grief

I never know
How I will react to bad news
Until it happens;
A patient’s passing
Brief and bare
The surprising ache of grief;
How little I remember of him
Yet how exactly I recall
His countenance

Maybe it is easier that way.
There are fewer words
That could be said
What ifs—
Words clipped
For convenience

A colleague loses her husband and
Grief paints a different rainbow
Orange car, yellow tape,
What I imagine the accident
To have been like

In Rite Aid
The sympathy cards are
Pastel pretty
Next to
Graduation cards
And Happy Birthdays
For him and for her
(how many ways
can one say
sorry for your loss
while meaning
I do not know
what to say
what to do)

Still the right words elude me
Like a monster hungry for breath
I grasp at them
Splice myself into their
As if trying not to forget
Meaning exists
As if trying to make
My own

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